Wry On The Rocks

The number one question on all lawyers’ minds these days??….where in the hell does Gloria Allred find these people?  One of the leading trial attorneys in the nation gave her credit…”I’ve got to admit, when it comes to dumpster-diving for clients, she’s the queen.” 

Allred’s latest “client”, Sharon Bialek, claimed in a press conference to have been groped by presidential candidate Herman Cain 13 years ago following a luncheon meeting.  While she didn’t file a complaint at that time, she claims she did tell her then boyfriend and another person.   Ms. Allred then waved a sheaf of papers in the air which she claimed were sworn affidavits of those persons, but refused to disclose their names.  “A little trick I picked up from Joe McCarthy back in the day”, she later admitted with a smile.  “I always carry extra papers ’cause you never know who you’re going to run into in welfare offices, rehab clinics or dumpsters.”

Despite being an unemployed single mother with 2 past bankrupcy filings and past due tax liens, Ms. Bialek claims she came forward not for the money, but because her 13-year-old son urged her “to do the right thing.” 

It just makes me proud to be an American.

Still waiting in line for your flu shot.  Well, here’s some good news for any Americans worried about Gitmo prisoners being located totheir neck of the woods…they’ve all been vaccinated for the H1N1 virus.  Except for the ones we flew to Bermuda.

Who says there’s no justice?  Remember Robert Shapiro?  He of the Dream Team that got the Juice off the hook…for which it was reported that OJ paid him $3 million for his work?  Well, lately he’s been on TV flogging his latest venture, LegalZoom.com, in which he explains how, with his software, you can be your own lawyer.    What wasn’t reported is that after he cashed  OJ’s check, he called him and said ,  “Thanks for the check…but you could have done this yourself for one ninety nine!”